ohev sick
bleh I feel terrible, and if Diedre hadn't come this whole weekend would have been crap. I feel sick now and I fetlt terrible before she came, I lost my cell phone, I didn't really get much done, I realized stuff thats at home that I need to do, and I'm getting sick of my school, cuz everything is always locked up on weekends and it's starting to bother me cuz I hate calling the police to have everything openned and I can't practice and I cant my aquatic ecology lab work. I just failed my organic test with a 59.
and y es I realize this is just a terrible and pointless rant on how terrible I feel, but if you didin't want to read it than get the Fuck out of my head
I'm tired and sick and frustrated and pissed that Diedre's gone, which isn't fair or sensical, There's not even a person to be mad at, and god I wish i could just be like hey will you marry me? get married quit school get a job like half the rest of my friends have done since they can't fucking stay in school. And just live with her
Huh there I said it now whoever the fuck reads this is gonna be like ohmy god yadda yadda and I don't care right now, I physically hurt for no good reason, the moment she left I felt terrible, and couldn't do anything went to sleep for an hour and realized I wasn't feeling better just more lethargic more like I wanted to just curl up in a ball and die. She should be getting back by now but she's not on of course she's got to unpack and talk to her roomates, and Ihope she's ok
I think I would die if she didn't make it back
and I kknow I absolutely know I can't but i just want to go visit her, and in my head it's sayiing next weekend which i know I can't do, but if I keep feeling like this I won't make it that far hell I won't make it another 2 days.
And I feel like an ass hole at times cuz she seems so sad to leave, and I feel like Mr.emotionless and it's like just make her feel better, and she leaves and I want to just run after the car, but just like no, you shouldn't do that, but then when her car goes around that last turn and I can't see it I go to walk back and realize i feel like shit.
And as i started to right this it occured to me that I had been feeling like shit before she visited, and was like ahh what a terrible time to visit, I look terrible I feel terrible, but she came and everything was happy and good.
I meant to spend some time with Amanda but yeah didn't really get to
Huh I miss her so much and it's like she hasn't even been gone yet I mean it hasn't even beeen long enough for her to get back, and I want to just call her. and I want to kiss her and I want to at least talk to her, but no I can't I don't have a cell phone and she's not online and I'm no where near her.
Ahhh god I want to just have her with me, and its like god I'll take any help I can get, but its not like psychologist or doctor or anything else could just bring her here, I mean they could make my head and stomache and chest stop hurting but thats stopping the symptoms never really accomplishes anything, which makes me be like damn I hate politics not cuz I hate them I enjoy them but I hate what everyone does and thinks like us and our war on terrorism. Problem one is you have to understand what terrorism is, and secondly that a war on terrorism is like a war on being sick, you can't just launch a missle at it and make it go away, you have to use the right tools the right way to fight it. It's not a war between nations, and you can't treat it that way.
You have to go to the cause and stop it, you have to educate and befriend you have to get rid of hate, it may take 20 30 years but you can save the next generation, fighting it with missles and guns only increases hate and only makes them more determined and more willing to fight, and sacrifice for terrorism, or freedom, just to destroy evil, because as they see it terrorism is better than what they are striking and usually they see themselves loosing their basic rights, and the other party as evil. Which America is all to inclined to believe our frickin selves, relgion makes this so easy to do, and with our gay people are evil tactics ahh I hate people, how can we say we our better than any/every other racist constricting unbalanced and unfair government.
I;m tired my eyes hurt
Do you want to know how my characters fit into this they don't!!! Why . . . because not one of them has any romantic anything in the story, why?? you ask because when I started writing I didn't know enough about realationships, and now that i have more an Idea there are almost no girls even in the story to do anything with, you may ask why there are none, and its not cuz I'm sexist or like hey girls don't belong in adventure story, it's more of a hey I suck socially and never really hung out with any girls that weren't tomboys and so it's like no so putting in characters like that would make my story more difficult cuz I'm not a girl and don't really see how they think, and yeah so just I"ll shut up and why isn't Diedre on yet its 8:42 she left 5:30sih and it's less than a three hour drive ok I'm done with this rant now I'm gonna go check my car for my cell phone again.
The mentally disturbed
monster who loves the hot chick
and y es I realize this is just a terrible and pointless rant on how terrible I feel, but if you didin't want to read it than get the Fuck out of my head
I'm tired and sick and frustrated and pissed that Diedre's gone, which isn't fair or sensical, There's not even a person to be mad at, and god I wish i could just be like hey will you marry me? get married quit school get a job like half the rest of my friends have done since they can't fucking stay in school. And just live with her
Huh there I said it now whoever the fuck reads this is gonna be like ohmy god yadda yadda and I don't care right now, I physically hurt for no good reason, the moment she left I felt terrible, and couldn't do anything went to sleep for an hour and realized I wasn't feeling better just more lethargic more like I wanted to just curl up in a ball and die. She should be getting back by now but she's not on of course she's got to unpack and talk to her roomates, and Ihope she's ok
I think I would die if she didn't make it back
and I kknow I absolutely know I can't but i just want to go visit her, and in my head it's sayiing next weekend which i know I can't do, but if I keep feeling like this I won't make it that far hell I won't make it another 2 days.
And I feel like an ass hole at times cuz she seems so sad to leave, and I feel like Mr.emotionless and it's like just make her feel better, and she leaves and I want to just run after the car, but just like no, you shouldn't do that, but then when her car goes around that last turn and I can't see it I go to walk back and realize i feel like shit.
And as i started to right this it occured to me that I had been feeling like shit before she visited, and was like ahh what a terrible time to visit, I look terrible I feel terrible, but she came and everything was happy and good.
I meant to spend some time with Amanda but yeah didn't really get to
Huh I miss her so much and it's like she hasn't even been gone yet I mean it hasn't even beeen long enough for her to get back, and I want to just call her. and I want to kiss her and I want to at least talk to her, but no I can't I don't have a cell phone and she's not online and I'm no where near her.
Ahhh god I want to just have her with me, and its like god I'll take any help I can get, but its not like psychologist or doctor or anything else could just bring her here, I mean they could make my head and stomache and chest stop hurting but thats stopping the symptoms never really accomplishes anything, which makes me be like damn I hate politics not cuz I hate them I enjoy them but I hate what everyone does and thinks like us and our war on terrorism. Problem one is you have to understand what terrorism is, and secondly that a war on terrorism is like a war on being sick, you can't just launch a missle at it and make it go away, you have to use the right tools the right way to fight it. It's not a war between nations, and you can't treat it that way.
You have to go to the cause and stop it, you have to educate and befriend you have to get rid of hate, it may take 20 30 years but you can save the next generation, fighting it with missles and guns only increases hate and only makes them more determined and more willing to fight, and sacrifice for terrorism, or freedom, just to destroy evil, because as they see it terrorism is better than what they are striking and usually they see themselves loosing their basic rights, and the other party as evil. Which America is all to inclined to believe our frickin selves, relgion makes this so easy to do, and with our gay people are evil tactics ahh I hate people, how can we say we our better than any/every other racist constricting unbalanced and unfair government.
I;m tired my eyes hurt
Do you want to know how my characters fit into this they don't!!! Why . . . because not one of them has any romantic anything in the story, why?? you ask because when I started writing I didn't know enough about realationships, and now that i have more an Idea there are almost no girls even in the story to do anything with, you may ask why there are none, and its not cuz I'm sexist or like hey girls don't belong in adventure story, it's more of a hey I suck socially and never really hung out with any girls that weren't tomboys and so it's like no so putting in characters like that would make my story more difficult cuz I'm not a girl and don't really see how they think, and yeah so just I"ll shut up and why isn't Diedre on yet its 8:42 she left 5:30sih and it's less than a three hour drive ok I'm done with this rant now I'm gonna go check my car for my cell phone again.
The mentally disturbed
monster who loves the hot chick
posted by Scott | 8:24 PM
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